Senior Wellness: How to Handle Your Grief
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As a senior, you’ve lived a long life, and very few things can surprise you anymore. However, no matter what you’ve been through or how many ups and downs you’ve had, nothing can prepare you for the loss of a spouse. Managing that kind of grief weighs heavily on your heart, mind, and body.
Grief takes a serious toll, especially on seniors, no matter how resilient they are. Wellness and coping with loss is an important skill to develop, particularly for seniors who deal with aging, grief, and change. As seniors grieve, it’s vital they have a safe, supportive space to express their roller coaster of emotions. However, some seniors struggle with the grieving process, especially if the death was tragic or unexpected. Here are some ways to manage grief that lasts longer or is more severe than normal.
Substance Abuse
Sometimes grief makes it extremely difficult to manage your daily tasks. However, when seniors survive the death of a spouse due to substance abuse, they may feel an overwhelming sense of guilt, thinking they could have done more to stop it. Surviving seniors may consider the death of their spouse unfair or could be in denial if the situation was particularly traumatic.
In those instances, emotions can be incredibly complex. In fact, sometimes seniors feeling this level of grief might even act apathetic, unwilling to talk about the death or about the spouse. This often occurs with the shame or stigma associated with death of a loved one to substance abuse. It’s important that seniors find a comfortable space to open up, whether by journaling, visiting a mental health professional, or confiding in a trustworthy friend.
Clinical Depression
Grief that lasts too long or goes too deep can also trigger clinical depression, especially with a senior who has a history of mental health issues. When grief transitions into depression, the seniors may have trouble sleeping, concentrating, making decisions, or eating. Along with depression may come with an increased risk of suicidal thoughts or actions. Grief and depression this deep and persistent might make suicide seem like the only way to stop the pain.
If you or a senior you know are showing signs of depression, it’s crucial to get help right away. While some people move through this on their own, studies show that depression in seniors can worsen physical health, as well.
Promoting Healing
When you’re ready, find ways to acknowledge the loss. There is no one right way to manage grief, but there are healthy ways to encourage healing. First, don’t avoid the emotions of grief—like sadness, anger, and guilt. No matter how bad you feel, stay focused on your health and nutritional needs. Grief can be stressful on your body, so joining a fitness class, taking your dog for a walk with a friend, or taking a cooking class can help you stay motivated.
If you want to create a process for healing, consider planting a garden or creating a scrapbook that helps you remember your loved one, while also moving through the pain. Sometimes experiencing grief with your senses, like sight, touch, and sound, can be therapeutic. You may even want to look into online wellness courses for seniors.
The important thing to remember is to watch out for the warning signs that grief is growing into something more substantial. Since there’s no one way to grieve or even a standard amount of time, it can be hard to recognize when it’s time to get help. Open up to a strong support network so you can move through a healthy grieving process.